Life is tough and I am tougher

After the two months of limited activity dealing with the tendonitis, what I have turned out to be a fracture.

I feel angry, frustrated and has been an emotional mess.  I've been trying to be positive for the last 3 months or so, focusing on not being too bothered by the inability to walk.  Considering how much I used to run (~5 times/wk) and how much walking I do just doing the day-to-day stuff, it's HARD... physically and emotionally.  But I keep telling myself, it'll get better.  Now when I thought I was almost through, I ned to do everything all over again.  I'm drained of all the positivity and mental toughness :(  I feel I've been running a marathon with this injury but right before I reach the end, I'm told I've ran the wrong race.  I feel so angry because my doctor just wouldn't listen to me from the beginning when I tried to tell her "it doesn't feel like a tendon problem, I feel something is broken, why don't we do an MRI if the x-ray is negative..."

But I know all this negativity is not going to help me get anywhere.  I should gather whatever I have inside focusing on healing and getting better fast.

I feel so lucky how many awesome friends I have.  They come over, listen to my bitching, bringing food, laughter, crutches, calcium pills.. whatever they can to cheer me up.

I feel so extremely lucky how awesome a husband I have.  If I've been "running the marathon" with the injury, he's been running alongside of me this whole time without one word of complain.  Yet when I just can't deal with this anymore, he is still there, doing everything he can around the house, buying whatever I want from the store, researching on the diet/aircast whatever he can, cheering me up every second no matter how negative and bitter I could be.

For all the people I love and most importantly for myself, I need to be STRONG!!  I know I have that inside.

In the next month or so, I will focus on:

Finishing my paper I've been dragging
All the things I've been putting off career-wise
Studying the MRI open course

A lot of core exercise, upper body exercise and stretching (have a set period of time doing that every morning and night)

Cook/Bake a different recipe every other day and finally go through the 1 million bookmarked pages

Spend quality time with Casey

Have friends over 2-3 times a week to cook and hang out together  

Eat nutritious meals and nourish the body

Write down how I feel on the blog every night

Read at night and go to bed early

Yes, I know I can do this!!  Life is an experience, instead of trying to change it (which nobody can anyway), I should just enjoy the ride and cherish every moment of it.  Just because it's not the way I expected it to be, it doesn't mean life is not good!

Life is still good and I'm a lucky girl!  Don't ever forget that!